From bad writing to anti-shipping to pure filth, we promise to never speak of the following ever again.
The end of the world was nigh, or so everyone at Winterfell thought, as the battle against the Night King and his army of the undead loomed. But while a number of Thrones favourites could argue that they’d lived somewhat long and fruitful lives, one of the characters in particular had unfinished business.
Arya Stark, who had accomplished so much in her short time on earth, still had one item on her to-do list (as opposed to her other list), and that was Gendry. The skilled assassin didn’t want to die a virgin, so she took it upon herself to seek out the blacksmith and make the first move.
But while there was some applause from viewers who praised the fantasy saga for finally giving Arya a typical teenager storyline, a lot of people found it really, really weird, not least because we’ve followed Arya’s story since she was a young child.
At least it wasn’t incest, right?
2. Bodyguard – Julia and David
Jed Mercurio’s Bodyguard had viewers hooked from the get-go. The political thriller was loaded with simmering tension as the audience tried to work out what David Budd and Julia Montague’s true intentions were and where the narrative would take them next.
It was a game of cat and mouse, everyone a player upon the stage, wearing a variety of masks depending on who they were talking to and what they wanted to get out of the situation.
And then the pair of them starting getting and hot and heavy in a hotel room and all of a sudden, what felt like a well-constructed piece of drama did the one thing it really didn’t need to do: fall back on sex, because sex sells.
But in this this case, what we already had was more than enough.
Why, Jed? Why?
When Rory Kinnear graduated from drama school, we can’t imagine he thought he’d be asked to have sex with a pig, but Charlie Brooker put that to him for his role as Prime Minister Michael Callow in the first season of Black Mirror, and he said yes.
We don’t actually witness the deed (thank everything holy), but we do get a close-up of Callow’s face on a TV screen, wearing what can only be described as pure shame and devastation all over his face as the nation watches on both enthralled and repulsed.
But even though we don’t see it, it doesn’t make it any less disturbing – a trait Black Mirror has nailed exceedingly well.
Great TV, but the most stomach-churning sex scene on this list.
4. Gossip Girl – Jenny and Chuck
As soon as you heard the phrase “scandalous lives of Manhattan’s elite”, you knew Gossip Girl hadn’t come to play, but the teen drama took things too far, desecrating Blair Waldorf’s good name and breaking fans’ hearts when Chuck Bass and Little J had sex.
During ‘Last Tango, Then Paris’, Blair finally headed over to her lover’s apartment to tell Chuck how she felt, but the scoundrel had already done the dirty with Jenny, who managed to slip out without being seen.
But secrets never did manage to stay hidden in such circles, and the truth unraveled.
Cue the furious fan outbursts.
5. Game of Thrones again – Jaime and Brienne
Arya and Gendry weren’t the only ones who decided it was a case of now or never when it came to getting their kit off. Jaime and Brienne also ended up doing the deed after a few too many wines and fans of the show were largely unimpressed.
But their distaste didn’t stem from the fact that Brienne had sex. She’s a human being, and like many others out there she experiences both lust and longing. She too, like Arya, believed that there was a very probable chance that the White Walkers would likely be the end of her. So, after a little coaxing from Jaime: why not?
But not only was it all about Jaime, their tryst was used as a plot device to serve him and his twisted devotion to his lover and sister, Cersei, and many felt that their relationship had, up until that moment, been built on a platform of mutual respect and they had come to regard one another as equals. For many viewers, their relationship was never romantic anyway – it was about Brienne restoring Jaime’s honour and Jaime granting Brienne the respect of a true peer.
The last shot we saw of Brienne was her standing in the rain, sobbing and utterly broken, which demonstrates the complete opposite.
It was all, essentially, for nothing.
Bad. Very, very bad.
6. MotherFatherSon – Caden and the sex worker
We are a divided nation more often than not these days, but BBC’s MotherFatherSon had everyone singing from the same hymn sheet following a bizarre sex scene at the end of the first episode.
Billy Howle’s Caden paid a sex worker to come over to his apartment for what, we thought, would be a fairly standard affair. But Caden, who had substance abuse issues and mental health problems, told the woman: “I need you to pretend you know nothing about your body or mine, no knowledge of any kind.”
And so the weird display, both chilling and devoid of any human emotion, began, and viewers at home found it all a bit much.